Archive for the ‘universal truth’ Category

Letter to God, continued, part two

Thursday, June 28th, 2007

Open Letter to God (original)

Hi God.

It’s me, again.

I know that you hear me everyday, chatting, begging, pleading, reasoning-asking for faith. You would think the mere fact I turn to you is faith itself, wouldn’t You?

But I know me, and You know me, and I am wrestling with my ego, unwilling to give it up, unwilling, because I think I will lose me, and my faith in You in the process.

Is that what they call, a paradox?

My “second” letter to You I started in a small, discounted, bound leather brown book, gold edged pages, a piece of fabric to mark where I left off. Small enough to go with me wherever I choose, anywhere but in my pocket. I will get back to that, that the book I choose to speak to You within could not fit within the smallest spaces. But not yet God, not yet.

I started my book, the first page, like this:

“To any who may enter here, turning the pages – remember – this is my journey – my perception of the world. Without collective consciousness, you may find yourself lost and without understanding as to my wording, my intent, my context and that will be as it is.


But I continued God, I turned the page.

Another day I said to You:

I am unsure whether it is truly a grand awakening or as we stumble step by step, we find ourselves in a new place of thought.

I desire in these pages to embrace my voice, my connection with God, to truly hear the voice of God and live with that knowledge.

We know so little, barely skimming the surface of this Earth. What can I say as to how much I know of ultimate Truth or knowledge?

I long to amass, piece by piece, a web, a ladder, a matrix of higher learning. Why is there so much unknown? It came to me that with a shift in the energy fields, a rebalancing, we could accomplish anything. We could form energy barriers to prevent destruction of humanity along shorelines. Energy bumper fields to prevent cars, trains and planes form impact and consequent calamity.

On some level, answers are known. At the point it becomes realized, we will have most likely also have abolished the need for mechanical transport.

The hardest part is breaking out of the self created barriers. The nine to five of the imposed Society.

I no longer have any aspiration to remain a lawyer. None. I find it distasteful and I resent people’s refusal to move toward resolution.

I want to cry. Big, tearing gulping sobs. It is my own own inaction that keeps me stuck in place.

Hi God. Yup, me.

Here I sit. In a “County”, a seat of justice. I drove down the highway, a torrential rain pour. I was lucky I even brought myself to drive 50 mph and the other people, flying by, driving so fast, do they wonder what would happen if they hydroplaned?

Same day, later than who I was this morning. So much later that I must try three times to flip the pages of this journal, so thick the leaf edge, I don’t dare believe I bought this for myself to speak to God. I throw down my old glasses, they fall from my nose anyway, so stretched the arms have become. I don’t need them to read these pages.

So, anything new?

There is so very much I write in my head, between the moments – now and before – it never gets on the page. For now, I will put aside this journal, this memorable me, put it aside and read the book I bought on Gandi. I so passionately want to continue reading and I will slip inside the realm of semi-consciousness sleep state, when I dream in guarded dreams of tomorrow.

*If they ever obliterate tactile writing and reading, I will elect to ascend, immediately.

Siting outside today, another day without a blackberry. How much more peaceful. Sitting outside, a small diner, with tables set out on brick pavers. Small sign says: ‘sorry, we do not accept credit cards’.

Quickly I ask, how much for a cup of coffee and a toasted english muffin? $2.25, plus tax. I check. I have a five and some change, fair enough for a decent tip, I order.

I sit across from the courthouse, another case where settlement negotiations will change and the mood of the equity judge, King of all Kings, or as Alice said, the King of nothing, all at once, is less predictable than a storm at Sea.

I had a dream last night, I’m sure of not many things, but this I recall…a bird coming to land on my shoulder, momentarily frightened as I am not sure if it will claw me; then my fear becomes less and I began to worry of the bird relieving itself on my back. It begins to sing with me. I ran around to show people the miracle, but another bird, a small sparrow, flew into my mouth.

I’m tired now God. I will go, there is never a moment You don’t hear me anyway.

***Hey God, as an afterthought, I sound like I’m just stamping my feet.

***Upon further thought God, I need to say, although You know this already, I was in fact stamping my feet.  I complain about the justice system, about being a lawyer, and the simple fact is, I simply wish we lived in a world where we needed neither a justice system nor lawyers.  My acts of complaining about it, poking at different sectors of the system, does nothing to change the whole and only adds negativity.  So thanks for listening.

Ubuntu: Desmond Tutu & Brad Pitt

Saturday, June 9th, 2007

Recently I came across the word Ubuntu.

The word intrigued me as much as the word Namaste intrigues me.

Synchronicity lead me to buy the latest Vanity Fair Magazine, highlighting different people and their efforts in Africa. Within that magazine was a conversation between Desmond Mpilo Tutu, the archbishop emeritus of Cape Town, South Africa, and Brad Pitt, the well known actor, and now well recognized humanitarian.

I first read the article regarding Jeffrey Sachs, entitled Jeffrey Sachs’s $200 Billion Dream, by Nina Munk. I wasn’t simply enthralled with the intelligence that lead to the ability to create and foster both dreams and a realized reality for others, I was left in a state of incomprehension by the tenacity, the sheer perseverence of the mission Mr. Sachs, his family, people working with him, and countless others exhibit. I have a dream, it’s a smaller one, called surface earth, the zipcode exchange: the intent is to create a web, beginning within a single community, then spanning silken strands, community by community, until no person or no part of this Earth is left untouched, people helping others, constantly, as a natural way of life, a readjustment. I am still working on my matrix, whereas Mr. Sachs has run with his.

I continued reading on….

From the table of contents on Vanity Fair Online you can see:

THE TUTU CONNECTION Archbishop Desmond Tutu won the Nobel Peace Prize for opposing apartheid in South Africa. Talking with Brad Pitt, he explains why the fight for equality must go global. Photographs by Annie Leibovitz”.

I, however, have the print edition because I prefer in many ways, the printed page. I was wildly pleased when I began the article at page 96, to see within the fifth exchange the following:

Brad Pitt: What is this concept of Ubuntu I keep reading about?

Desmond Tutu: Ubuntu is the essence of being human. And in our language a person is ubuntu, and ubuntu is a noun to speak about what it means to be human. In essence, it is something that you find especially in the Old Testament, where you’re not quite sure sometimes-when you are reading, say the Psalms-whether the Psalm is speaking, where it says, ‘I,’ only of an individual, or is it speaking in a corporate sense? We say a person is a person through other persons. You can’t be human in isolation. You are human only in relationships.

Brad Pitt: So that speaks to our interconnectedness.

Desmond Tutu: We are interconnected………………….

Normally, I would go on, type more of the article, the exchange, but some things must be made palpable, must be received through sensory perceptions, since we so long ago closed off other means of perception…read the article, in fact, read the entire magazine.

I am convinced – Ubuntu – is not just a beautiful word that sings without need for comprehension, Ubuntu is also a journey.


Monteray: The Beginning

Wednesday, June 6th, 2007

Excerpts of Monteray have been moved to a new page, entitled:  Monteray, The Book

I digress………

Tuesday, May 29th, 2007

I don’t know what tomorrow will bring.


I believe there may be very real enlightened persons, mystics, etc. that may have a clue about tomorrow, but I don’t.

I am like an ant, burrowing, carrying, following, content in my habitat, believing it will happen again and again.

But really, I have no clue if I will even be on Earth tomorrow.

Because of that I wonder, should I take more risks or less?

If I believe in Heaven, and a very mean, ogre or troll like God under the bridge, will it keep me on the straight and narrow?

Or is it enough for me to know who I want to be and who I don’t? Without the fear of an all powerful, vengeful God?

I have to admit, I have always thought God is all good, and in being all good, he could not be vengeful or judgmental. He could not issue empty threats. Only man does that for his own means. No gender discrimination intended, I am of a certain age and background where I learned God is “he”; consequently, my language patterns naturally fall back on this preconceived notion. I now believe God can be anything.

So, where am I going? What stones do I intend to step on in this meandering path of life with few markers or sign posts?

I talk about not knowing if I will be here tomorrow. When does tomorrow begin? Is it after midnight? Is it the next moment which transcends the moment of this thought?

I heard today of two children, thirteen year olds, fit, athletic kids, loving families, diagnosed with leukemia. It broke my heart.

I thought again, hours later, of how I believe negative energy and a lack of cleansing creates physical disintegration and I realized, I cannot believe that is true for our children.

To believe that negative energy leads to sickness connotes that there is a responsibility to think positively, to clear out and unburden the negative….how does this apply to the young?

Are there theories of Soul DNA or Soul Karma, something carried over? If so, why should it be that the young of this Earth should be so burdened to undo what many of us adults cannot?

I struggle looking for the book of Truth. The one book. I amass uncontroverted facts, ones tested and true, time and again, which remain true despite the tests, to compile what someday may be my personal book of Universal Truth. The pages are more empty than full.

Is that because I am pessimistic? Maybe. It is also though because I have not been able to amass enough signposts on this road of life and continue to wonder, after so many centuries, why have we not handed down to each other the true “Bible”, the Bible of Humanity, well being, love and life?

Breathing beyond the tabloids: Angelina Jolie…no gossip… no judgment

Thursday, May 24th, 2007

I’m wondering….what is the price of gossip?

Ronnie over at WorkCoach sent me a link on gossip, knowing my profound fascination with what I consider the damage and the price of gossip.

I digress….

Yesterday, I stopped at a deli/cafe/luncheonette: not sure how to describe the place except it is homey with excellent food. My husband and myself found ourselves able to have a good cup of coffee and a meal together…priceless. I was there when the owner of the “cafe” bought a flat screen television for the wall and remember his excitement.

So on this stolen morning I walk in and see Angelina Jolie as big as life on the Today Show. Now of course, my husband knowing that I admire Ms. Jolie, walked over to the television to turn up the volume because it was a busy day there at the cafe.

A group of women were meeting for breakfast, one turned, watching me watching the screen…and said…”she actually looks more human.”

Ok, um, I think I get that, she is larger than life, smeared on tabloids, photographed at angles and in light that normally make her appear to be….a space alien?

Regardless, I strained to watch and listened and learned, that yes, after my long day, I could maybe make it home in time to see the Dateline episode. And I did, it began at ten Eastern time and my family was a bit loud, but I crept closer to our not flat tv screen……………..

You see, I admire Ms. Jolie on a few fronts:

1. she’s honest

2. she tells it like it is

3. she either tells us or doesn’t everything

4. she’s a humanitarian.

Big word: humanitarian.

Maybe she is smeared and smashed across God knows how many fronts for the sole purpose of the media/magazines making money…but there are a few things you cannot take from her…she does not need to adopt children or birth children to get better movie ratings…she does not need to endanger herself and spend her money on strangers for better ratings….she is not an unfit mother because she cares about others and dares to do something about it…

I’m sorry, I got carried away.

My point is simply, she sends a good message to younger girls and women. You made a mistake? You experimented? You weren’t sure who you were at 16 and did things that at 30 you regret or don’t want anyone to find out about?

Why live with that?

Why live with the fear of shame and judgment? It simply inhibits growth.

Gossip kills, if not literally, then a piece at a time, until the light within all of us is extinguished.

See further resources, ask yourself, if you had untold millions, what would you do?



The Angelina

The Bible, the Museum & the Shark

Wednesday, May 23rd, 2007

Disjointed lines of thought?

Is that what you are thinking?

Isn’t life one disjointed line of thought?

Welcome to Kentucky’s new museum:

New York Times: “Adam and Eve in the Land of Dinosaurs”, by Edward Rothstein

“For here at the $27 million Creation Museum, which opens on May 28 (just a short drive from the Cincinnati-Northern Kentucky International Airport), this pastoral scene is a glimpse of the world just after the expulsion from the Garden of Eden, in which dinosaurs are still apparently as herbivorous as humans, and all are enjoying a little calm in the days after the fall.

It also serves as a vivid introduction to the sheer weirdness and daring of this museum created by the Answers in Genesis ministry that combines displays of extraordinary nautilus shell fossils and biblical tableaus, celebrations of natural wonders and allusions to human sin. Evolution gets its continual comeuppance, while biblical revelations are treated as gospel.

Outside the museum scientists may assert that the universe is billions of years old, that fossils are the remains of animals living hundreds of millions of years ago, and that life’s diversity is the result of evolution by natural selection. But inside the museum the Earth is barely 6,000 years old, dinosaurs were created on the sixth day, and Jesus is the savior who will one day repair the trauma of man’s fall.

It is a measure of the museum’s daring that dinosaurs and fossils — once considered major challenges to belief in the Bible’s creation story — are here so central, appearing not as tests of faith, as one religious authority once surmised, but as creatures no different from the giraffes and cats that still walk the earth. Fossils, the museum teaches, are no older than Noah’s flood; in fact dinosaurs were on the ark.”

So God enters the Museum and dinosaurs and man live in peace…is it such a far stretch to believe God did not eternally condemn females?

If you believe otherwise, how is it God granted a female shark the ability to reproduce without a male?

Humanity’s Team: Take Action Now!

Wednesday, April 25th, 2007

Helping to heal, a global humble effort to bring all of us together, some call it the sixth dimension, some collective consciousness, others, simple human kindness.

Humanity’s Team is scheduled for a U.S. event. In light of the unspeakable tragedy in Virginia, Anne Alba and other volunteers, have committed to offering students free housing and admission to this weekend’s Humanity’s Team “We are all One”, with Neale Donald Walsh in attendance.

Obviously, this leap of faith to make this gesture for the students can only come from one place, contributions from those that care and want to see this Society advance.

Any interested: go to Humanity’s Team helping the students in Virginia

Bless you all.

Good evening God

Wednesday, April 18th, 2007

I tried to write this post twice before, but started off with “hey”.

Not your choice of greetings?

God, I have to be honest, because whether I am or not, I have a feeling you will know.

I went into spiritual depletion.

I toured and trolled this virtual earth for the right answer to you.

I checked out raw diets and it was only days later, I noted there was little reference to you. Don’t eat sugars because they rot your teeth.

Ok. I’m old enough now to see the wisdom in that.

Yet, you intended for us to have this free food, no?

I don’t eat meat God. Just can’t get the hang of it. Don’t know how to divorce the picture of an animal that has family tendencies from what lands on the plate. Yet I will cook it, for anyone that visits, that needs meat.

I eat seafood. And yes, I stuggle, because there is a huge contradiction in what I believe and what I do. But I have to admit, there were moments in my life where I stuggled eating vegetables because I thought I heard them scream.

I read in one of Sylvia Brown’s books that we don’t have to eat when we pass on, and I resisted that. Now, I’m not so sure why I did as I was afraid that eating vegetables I could hear them while I chewed.

Mark it down to mental deficiency.

Fine by me.

God, I spiraled.

So convinced I was anti-religion that I began to actually seek comfort in what I grew with, Catholic doctrine.

I did something new this week though. I spiraled and crashed and then gave it to you.

I lost a case in Court and I was baffled that no one in the room cared that what occurred was improper and I got in my car, developed a migraine and then stopped…..I had promised to give it to you, no matter what, to guide me. Once I realized that and handed it over again, I smiled and I remembered to thank you for my smile.

So God, I don’t know what to follow. I’m not even good at being faithful to my belief in you. But I’m telling you what you already know, aren’t I?

I need you.

I know that much.

On blogging

Monday, April 16th, 2007

I have read a lot here at on why we blog.

What we do with blogging, what we shouldn’t.

I have only one thought: (*lie)

Blogging for us here at surface earth is to be the the food processer of thought.

We search, we troll, we are always on the edge of the eternal question, why?

Fascinated by manifestation, the law of attraction, healing, faith, religion, spirituality….what we really want to know in all of the questioning is why?

What is the common denominator of all the thoughts mainifested?

Is the missing integral simply faith in the unknown?

None of us know, or so few of us that they have not been able to harness the resources and bind it in any publishable form.

We don’t know why we are here, we don’t even know where here is and yet we place rules and regulations upon this supposed life…………….why?

Copyright © 2009 All Rights Reserved